My preferred café is closed over the holiday season so I’ve been visiting the slightly less fashionable one down the street. It’s run by a Turkish lady and her business partner. They’ve bought this place at considerable financial risk. Business is less than hoped for, in spite of the fact that she cooks very well and they make good coffee. The place is an old house; large. Ugly. No other word for it.

Today, after asking some questions about her clientele, I gave her some unsolicited marketing advice on how to improve business.

1. Remove ugly signage

2. Work your strengths

The strongest area is the side path along the left hand side of the building; dappled light, intimate but barely noticeable from the street. There are about 8 tables for two behind the two front ones.

I suggested she needs to draw attention to this area by creating a bamboo wall (say) from the front of the house to the street, so that the path is the same width all the way. Re-orient the tables and chairs so they face the same way as the ones down the back; that will exaggerate the visual connection.

3. Garden full of furniture; house full of plants

We should visually join the inside of the premises (which are quite friendly) to the outdoor area. Because of the tinted window it’s not clear that there is seating in there. So remove the tinting.

4. Atmosphere is not necessarily expensive

The predominant view walking past the premises is this white wall. Note ugly pipes:

But look closer; there are colourful flowers on the ground:

These need to be put on blocks so that they are eye level or at least cover the pipes. This and an understated wall feature higher up will do the trick. The owner likes gardening. I told her to go crazy. Tiny vase on each table. Visible flowers in that front area will add massive appeal at practically no cost.

I’ll update via the comments if she implements and advise of the results.

From the Department of I Told You So, Google’s Lively has got the boot and Second Life continues to lose corporate traction. Reuters and Avastar have abandoned the platform. Quarter three in Second Life saw negative growth.

Business was interested in Second Life because it was a new interface and it was growing quickly. There will be interest again when there is a jump in the user experience or user numbers. Platform stability would also be a bonus. User numbers will grow only when there is a less demanding interface. Any bonehead can use Facebook.

Second Life’s legacy is significant; the compelling experience of virtual sex, the astonishing creativity of user-generated content in architecture and fashion, the rapid bonding powers of anonymous friendship…

It will continue to be interesting for at least two reasons; the education sector’s on-going search for a more engaging remote education experience and the governance issues surrounding virtual world environments as open as this. The most recent uproar in Second Life was over the pricing of certain types of islands, OpenSpace Sims but it is part of a long history of governance failures.

Linden Lab, who run Second Life, have complete authority but the passion of users who invest time in personal creativity and run virtual businesses makes law-making a very tough management task. I’ll never forget my first interaction with a Second Life entrepreneur; FURIOUS that someone had accidentally built over a virtual boundary, costing him (I calculated) around 20 cents an hour in revenue for a small number of hours. He was ready to rip someone’s head off.

The ego and significance that accrues in the virtual environment makes this a fascinating sandbox for modelling real-world decision-making. If LL work out how to make popular decisions in this environment, they will have learned something very valuable.

Photo by Miabella Foxley.

FREE. More than any other word, this word gives marketing a bad name. The most recent example to cross my virtual desk was a ‘Sponsor Update’ from WebProNews, a source of huge volumes of Search Engine Optimisation information; small portions of it useful. A ‘free’ offer for Brad Callen’s book, SEO Mindset: The Real Secrets To Getting #1 Google Rankings For Whatever Keywords You Want, Whenever You Want. Also cures cancer.

If you have to pay postage and handling, it’s not free Brad. If the book is free for those who pick it up in Podunk, Idaho, great. Say that it is a FREE PICK-UP in Podunk. If it’s free with an Amway Toilet Bowl Cleaner it’s a FREE WITH offer.

By the way, you say that the book has a value of $97. Have you sold it to people you don’t know for $97? Because otherwise you are scamming me. You say you are offering almost $470 worth of other products also ‘totally free’. They may be fantastic value but they are not ‘totally free’.

The marketing profession (American Marketing Association, Australian Marketing Institute – I’d link to them but their website doesn’t work) should delineate FREE, FREE PICK UP and FREE WITH. They should set parameters for establishing the value of a product that is not retailed. The practice of calling things free when they’re not and the practice of inventing ridiculously high values for your products should be the subject of industry attention and scorn.

You make us all look bad, Brad. Check your mindset.

The City of Perth is contributing $200,000 to the Christmas Pageant. But they want their pound of flesh. Naming rights. Trouble is, there are already two other sponsors. No problem, we’ll just call it “The RAC Channel 7 Christmas Pageant with the City of Perth”. I’m not making it up. That’s what they say the event will be known as.

Now, you know, and I know, the public is not going to call it that. It has been “The Christmas Pageant” since Jesus was a boy. Well, the 1970’s anyway.

It’s a great example of the quid pro quo mentality of modern sponsorship. Sure we’ll kick in some money; WHAT DO WE GET IN RETURN? Very Christmas-spirited of them.

In this case though, by insisting on a naming rights appendix, they just make their event look ridiculous.

Perhaps they should drop the words ‘Christmas Pageant’ altogether and just list the sponsors?

It’s an entertainment precinct which is down on its luck. The most visible sign of that is, um, the signage. Barricaded shopfronts, peeling paint, old decaying signs. Not to say there aren’t some well-presented businesses; the Dome, Oliver’s Restaurant, The Elephant & Wheelbarrow, the Brass Monkey all have attractive street presentation. Yet well-established businesses like Kakulas Bros, the Greek Taverna, Nandos, Cinema Paradiso, The Re Store and Tony Barlow, have faded signs, missing letters and facades that signal neglect and indifference. To me, those businesses degrade the precinct; they have the capacity to lead and they don’t.

Without a strong commercial interest group or re-development authority there is only local government to rely on and the City of Perth probably have other planning priorities. Left to its own devices it will continue its slow decline as the City of Perth foreshore develops and the western suburbs snare all the stylish restauranteurs.

If you had a brief to market the area you would need the authority to compel businesses to conform to presentation standards. This would include making signage fit its surrounds. Ageing brick buildings can accommodate painted signage, but big tin signs just look crap.

From presentation standards you would progress to coherence and then ambience, events and promotion. Let me just deal with coherence. I’d create 4 destinations. The Backpacker’s Quarter, The Mediterranean Quarter, The Asian Quarter and the Arts Quarter (which would include fashion).

Now you have four identities you can build on, each in a defined area, each of which can be separately marketed. You’d theme each quarter; street furniture, signage, art and walk trails.

Yes, it’s possible. Yes, the government would need to spend some money. But without an intention to create a focus, the slow decline will continue.

The resignation of Foster’s CEO Trevor O’Hoy, previously their CFO, was accompanied by an admission that the company paid too much for Southcorp wines. The rise of the Australian dollar was also mentioned. But I believe the company’s woes have more to do with a lack of dynamism in wine marketing.

New world wine-makers like Australia re-defined the business 20 years ago when they introduced the economies of machine harvesting and scientific principles into wine making. Victims of their own success: they made cheap wines better. Yellow Tail and Jacobs Creek became big brands in the US and the UK, and the market went ‘great! I can get quality bottled wine for US$5 dollars’. But that’s not where the profit is for wine makers.

So explain to me now why I should pay $20 a bottle for a better wine. That’s a hard sell. Let’s explore a few scenarios:

Marketer: You should pay $20 because this is an older wine, with more fruit intensity.
Consumer: It looks the same as the $5 bottle, just has a different year on it. How do I know it’s better?

Marketer: You should pay $20 because this is a better brand than the $5 bottle.
Consumer 1: It’s the same brand I buy for $5 a bottle. It just has a different bin number on it.
Consumer 2: How do I know that’s a better brand? I’ve never heard of it.
Consumer 3: There are hundreds of brands here. How the hell do you expect me to know which ones are better?

Marketer: You should pay $20 because this wine won a Gold Medal
Consumer: I bought a $5 bottle the other day; that won a Gold Medal too. Get a life! Most of those bottles over $20 don’t have any stickers on them.

Marketer: You should pay $30 because this is a restaurant
Consumer: Thanks very much for charging me $30 – I spend $8 when I buy the same wine in my bottle shop. It certainly demonstrates that paying more money gets me a better product.

If Fosters were a marketing-orientated company they would have picked up these attitudes and altered their marketing. They haven’t.

They needed to address the confusion over quality. As the owner of a portfolio of brands they could have introduced an internal ranking system and promoted that. Yes, the Penfolds Bin 389 won a Gold Medal in 2003. But it is only the 9th best shiraz we made that year. And it’s only drinking at 23/100 compared to the 1964 Grange.

And when I go to a bottle shop, instead of the 20%-off per case, which seems to be the only marketing promotion these guys ever use, why can’t I buy a vertical pack of the same variety? 2001, 2003, 2005. Let me see for myself how good the 2001 is.

I can see no evidence that Foster’s have used any social software to increase involvement of wine drinkers. Why can’t their consumers use the web and mobile technology to communicate with each other and the company about wine? Is this not a social product? Why have they not developed an International Wine Wankers Game?

And where is the packaging innovation? Why can I not buy single serve wine? I’d love to be able to go on a picnic and take two sachets of sparkling, one chardonnay, one riesling and a dessert wine instead of being locked in to one big heavy bottle. You can treat wine like a commodity and you’ll get commodity prices or you can look for a deeper understanding of consumer’s attitudes and the nature of the product. They will lead to more profitable product differentiation.

From the Foster’s web site: “We believe in placing the consumer and the customer at the heart of everything we do”. *Rolls eyes*. *Reaches for a drink*.

I saw a great use of the Telstra Phone Words product this week. Phone Words is the add-on service that lets you use a 13 or 1300 number in conjunction with a word. Makes it easy to remember a phone number. It’s particularly useful in radio advertising because the listener has a good chance of remembering the number. Er, the number-name.

The one I liked was a Day Spa business called Blush. The Phone Word was sign-written all over their limosine, used as part of their premium packages. Nice touch.

When I read 13DaySpa I imagined a Day Spa that lasted 13 days and I thought, that’s about how long I’d need. It cemented the name; here I am blogging about it.

Blush own the URL also, so clients who type in 13dayspa.com.au will be able to find them (it’s not set up yet though). This is an excellent integration of signwriting, phone and web marketing. Too often people treat their marketing channels as separate. I encourage clients to feature their phone number prominently on a web site. Web sites are a browse that needs to be turned into a sale. That’s much easier to do over the phone.

The fourth best thing about Japan, after Japanese ladies, Cupie Mayonnaise and the kotatsu is the attitude to customer service. Americans can give good service, but it’s different: it’s good because they want you to tip them. Not so much a service as a transaction. Australian service is better than it used to be, but people still confuse being of service with being subservient. Grudging niceness. Convict heritage.

The Japanese seem to understand better than most cultures that people like to be made to feel special. Attention to detail, extraordinary packaging and an unmatched willingness to correct any defect or problem in their product.

There is a tradition in Japanese retail of greeting the customer when they walk into your shop. The greeting Irrashaimase or its more casual form Irrashai rings out a million times a minute across the land. Such a simple thing to do. Acknowledge the customer the second they walk in your door. It carries more than one message: ‘I know you’re here. Thank you for coming. I’ll be with you as soon as I can’. Part of our unwillingness to do this in Western cultures I think stems from the ‘rude to shout’ value system – the staff are usually not next to the entrance. But if I had any retail clients, I’d be recommending public greetings as Standard Operating Procedure.

Businesses in Australia seem to be under the impression that once you’ve arrived in their store they’ve made a sale. Maybe so, but that doesn’t mean they’ve made you a customer. Every time I go to a coffee shop or restaurant I am re-assessing their worth; will I go back there or not? I think most people work on that principal.

Location is important, of course. But I don’t shop regularly for groceries at the closest supermarket. Nor do I regularly use the closest bottle shop. Because I don’t like those stores and I have a choice. My local coffee shop has my business because I am recognised when I go there. The little Indonesian girl sings out my name in greeting when I arrive and farewells me by name when I leave. And I have a rapport of some sort with the pretty girl that doesn’t smile enough and the shy ethnic ladies who work in food prep.

My third visit to a nearby Dome Coffee House earlier today will be my last. Blank-faced processing by the guy behind the counter. Not a single extra word taking my order or delivering my coffee. I realise there is a skills shortage but I don’t think it’s as serious as the training shortage.

I was interested to learn about the use of Adwords in testing potential names for books. Tim Ferriss found the name “Four Hour Workweek” the stand-out result in his Adwords testing and had a #1 bestseller. I guess he also tested “You Can Be Rich and Lazy If You Buy My Book”.

To be honest though, I was more impressed with the name Cathryn Jakobson Ramin chose for her book. It’s on the subject of memory loss in middle aged people. Come on! Guess what she called it!

Give up?

“That Memory Book”. Hahahaha. Here’s where you buy it.

There should be only two brands in Western Australian wine marketing. Margaret River and Western Australia. Although it is possible to market your wine as belonging to your local area (appellation/Geographic Indication/GI) this is a marketing blunder and wineries located outside Margaret River should follow a different path.

Margaret River has done a great job establishing a brand. The small number of pioneers who won international awards generated momentum and attracted a larger number of followers. These included well established West Australian companies, behemoths like BRL Hardy, a string of smaller cellar door operators and many entrepreneurs. All up, a great mix of different talents. That’s enough about Margaret River. Now I’m going to talk about ‘West Australia’, by which I mean, non-Margaret River.

West Australian wines are not going to cut it marketing themselves with their GIs. Although they make some extremely good wines, theirs are small and unknown GIs nationally and internationally. They just do not have a critical mass for marketing purposes. A different marketing strategy is needed that lets them market themselves as a coherent entity.

The Wine Industry Association of WA understands this problem and with the help of some state government funding and support from some corporates has established a brand as an export marketing tool. There are two problems with this. One: the positioning is not right. “Dominion of wine” says nothing about West Australia and frankly, is pompous. And don’t get me started on Australia-West.

Two: most of the WA wineries continue to market themselves on an appellation basis, calling themselves for example a ‘Great Southern’ wine, a ‘Swan Valley’ wine or wait for it, ‘Peel’.

These two problems have an overlapping solution. The great advantage Australia has as a wine-making culture is its willingness to innovate. The great advantage WA has as a wine-making region is terrific diversity of styles. It’s partly explained by being really old geologically and really big in area. A tremendous soil diversity exists and this has consequences for wine styles.

The ’story’ of West Australian wines should be diversity and innovation, not life-style, beaches or natural environment. Here’s how this positioning overlaps the appellation issue: if you market yourself as ‘Western Australian’ you are allowed to blend wines from different regions and sub-regions in that wine. You can mix Swan Valley shiraz with cool climate shiraz from the Great Southern. This leads to a complexity you cannot get with a Swan Valley or Great Southern wine alone.

This should be the positioning of West Australian wines: Adventures in winemaking. A willingness to introduce complexity through regional diversity and a willingness to innovate with winemaking. That positioning works as well in domestic marketing as it does in export. It’s an easy-to-understand story and it gives people a reason to buy a West Australian wine.